This world doesn’t make sense anymore

…Takes deep breathe…

I’m so confused about things in this life..

Two people never intend to really fall in love right away. Any two people (gay, lesbian, straight or bi) You can’t blame us for finding love even when to you it isn’t the right kind of love. We didn’t do this to hurt any of you or cause you to be angry at us because we did something you don’t approve of. If you could only see that we’re really happy, we are who were supposed to be with for the rest of our lives. Why don’t they just look past all that and be happy for us?

My bestie recently came out of the closet about her realionship with a girl. And also my bestie is married. yes i said marred.  I gotta admnit I’ve very very proud of her. She did the right thing by telling them, even if it was the hardest thing she’s ever had to do. I’m happy for her, accept her and love her no matter who she is with. And the  very thought of telling my parents that I’m dating a girl scares the little hell outta me.

I’m pretty sure I know what would happen if I opened up about it. I’d rather not go into detail.  It scares me that they would probably try to make me stop seening her. Which I wouldn’t!! ( Hence thats why I’m planning to move out.) I know writing them a letter and leaving it for them isn’t the best way to tell them i’m moving. I just think its the best I can do.  I don’t think I should be judged for it.

 

…Sighs…

I love her and I know to them that’s the wrong thing to do. But u know what?? It’s MY LIFE!!! fuck them and their judgements and hard words (that I’ll eventually have to listen to some day soon.) But I love her and I feel so right with her so whole. More whole then I have in my entire life. My life’s not that bad. I mean yes my past was and I still deal with that EVERY DAMNED DAY!! I make it through my days and get past it all one day at a time. Autumn makes things so much better for me. There isn’t another one like her in this world. So I gotta great catch 😉

Confused about this world and life. It was mega easier as a child. You didn’t have a care in the world. I know I always said I wanted to grow up, now I wish I  could take that back and do it all over. This world is so crazy and insane now days. What happened?? I feel like everything’s just gonna come tumbling down and there won’t be a damn thing anyone can do. I watch old movies like ( i love lucy and little house) I sometimes wish we could go back just a litle bit to those days kinda rolled all into one. Ik that sounds silly and doesn’t make any sence. Nobody has to even understand what I’m sayin I’m just rambling venting.

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2 comments on “This world doesn’t make sense anymore

  1. Things were so much easier when we were kids! I agree!! A couple of tv shows, lazy summer days,… Some times I wish I could go back. And then other times I am so glad that I don’t live under their roof any longer!!

    When did you discover you were into girls and guys? You should write a post about THAT! I’d love to read it!!

    I know that it is really hard what you are going through right now. I don’t know that I would say anything about Autumn to my parents either if I was in your situation. Why start a fight you can’t win? After you move though I think it would be a good idea to at least reach out to your parents (from a distance!!) and give them a chance to know the real you.

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